Tuesday, 10 March 2009

When Did That Pile Of Rubbish Arrive? And Who Delivered It? Part 3

The first two high viz. tabards only have one clipboard between them, but they seem to a make a lot of use of it. They've also got a mobile phone and they make use of that. They have a vehicle each, one in council livery the other not. They are poking about all over the place and nodding to one another in a knowing sort of way, it takes them over an hour to do this. Then two more unmarked cars turn up, each containing one man, a clipboard and a mobile phone. They poke about roughly where the first two poked about. More marks made on clipboards, and two more phone calls made. They go into a huddle quite close to the pile of rubbish with a sofa on top, look at it, point to it and then start looking around presumably for entry and exit points. A bit of gesturing indicates that they have worked out that a vehicle must have delivered it to it's present position and that the lane is the only possible point of entry.
I should probably point out that I have by this time got myself a cup of tea and am watching proceeding through a bedroom window. One more car carrying a suit without a clipboard comes up the lane and joins the huddle. There follows a bit more pointing and nodding and I would love to think that at this point they were synchronising watches, but I'm pretty sure they just all became aware at the same time that it was approaching 4.30 on a Friday afternoon, and then they were gone.
Bill was in the garden whilst all this was happening, and made his presence known over the back fence. He was told they were looking into it and would be moving it as soon as possible. We thought they had been looking into it for the last couple of hours, but there you go.
It’s Friday afternoon, Looks like we’re going to keep our new pile of rubbish and newly decorated sofa for a few more days.
The 'official' looking inspection of the pile caused a flurry of activity and more adults than usual visited it over the weekend, my husband included, all coming away with one bit of tat or another.
Our piece of tat was a black plastic tray which has disappeared into the shed, which had a couple of unopened envelopes stuck to it. Possibly Bill watches a bit too much television, but these envelopes represented a clue as to where the rubbish had originated, 'It's elementary my dear Watson.'
We got really hopeful on Monday morning, you'd have thought the councils environmental department were having a convention around the back of our house, we couldn't keep track of the number of cars and vans and people we saw.
I've got to say, a couple of the suits seemed to be on top of problem. They looked confident and in charge. Then I worked it out, they didn't have headache inducing jackets on but did sport shiny white hard hats which made them look taller, what with the nice dark suits and shiny shoes. One of them got quite excited by the envelopes then everyone retreated a bit when the Mouth Almighty appeared at the end of his garden preceded by his voice. I'm guessing by the arm gestures that he was telling them how to go about the job, but without a decent interpreter the meaning was completely lost.
Anyway, there was a bit more pointing, poking and scratching on clipboards and a few phone calls made, one of them was to me, I am standing by the kitchen window and can see the head of a suit on his mobile, my phone rings, I go and answer it and this chap is asking me if I was the person who phoned about the tipping. I took the phone back into the kitchen as I was saying I was one of the callers when I realized I was talking on the phone to a bloke who was standing just over the back fence. I found this quite amusing and must have sounded like a suitable case for treatment trying not to laugh while being asked if I knew who had tipped the rubbish and if I had seen of heard anything. The man was obviously the chief investigator as he was the same one that got excited about the envelopes.
They told Bill they would be back in a couple of days to 'clear it all up.' This sounded good.....

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